Hypothetically...

A few days ago I was bored, so inevitably my mind wandered into the wasteland of celebrity debautchery. As the harp music cued my imagination, I imagined the following scenario:

If my life were to be recreated by Tinseltown filmmakers, who would the Hollywood version of me be played by based on personality and appearance? Who would play my friends, etc?

I thought this would be a fun game to waste some time over the long weekend with Erik, but when I asked him who he would cast as me, he clearly did not know the rules of the game, nor did he care at all to play to begin with.

"Uh, I don't know, what's that actress again... oh yeah, uh... Penelope Cruz" he stares blankly at me.


"Erik, you have to at least think of someone who looks somewhat like me!" I say exasperatedly. Latina, I am not.

"I don't really care. This game is stupid. You are taking this far to seriously for something that will never happen," he replies.

"Oh, but come on, just think about it for a second, just say someone who is the same race as me!" I goad him.

"Alright, I would cast you as Star Jones. There, now you have it."

So according to Erik, if my life were to be portrayed on the Silver Screen, Erik would cast a freakishly addicted to plastic surgery Black woman to play me. Thanks, Erik.

What do you think? Which Hollywood person would play you?